March 1, 2004
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Will tell you about my weekend shortly. First I want to go over some of the headlines around the world . . . (I have 2 links, and 1 article)
Conservatives rally in D.C. from deseret news.
Utah’s Love Affair With Marriage Inspires Many
from ABC NewsLos Angeles celebrates Animal Marriage
from the California Tribune:March 1, 2004
Today the city of Los Angeles authorized 152 marriage licenses for people-animal couples. Animal rights organizations all over the world cheered during the mass marriage ceremony today as men joined their pets in holy matrimony.“I’ve been in a relationship with my goldfish for ten years,” said Gerald. A. Younger, “and now we were finally able to get married. I’m so happy that we can share the rest of our lives together.”
Younger’s new wife did not comment on the occasion.
Today’s ceremony did not come without years of struggle. In 1997 an animal lover, John Larson, was charged of having an innopropriate relationsip with his cat. At that time people-animal unions were illegal. Outraged at what he saw as a violation of rights between consenting beings, Larson took the issue to all the way to supreme court. The court ruled 5 to 4 in Larson’s favor, and the States were forced to abolish their anti-animal relationship laws.
While the Larson case started to change public opinion on relationships, marriage was considered out of the question. When the Mayor of Los Angeles voiced his tolerance of animal-people rights, conservative factions started picketing California offices with slogans like, “Marriage is a privalege, not a right” and “Save our morals.”
Letters poured into the capital pleading with the government to protect the sanctity of marriage, but for every letter there seemed to be a louder, more persistant voice insisting that Marriage should be for anyone.
“Marriage is a right, not a rite,” said an animal spokesperson, “If a goat wants to marry a man, why shouldn’t the government allow it?”
Thanks to persistent people-animal activists, freedom has once again triumphed in California. This new presedent could set wonderful standards for other lifestyles, but it may take a while for the public to accept them.
“Men belong with women, not butterflies,” said President George W. Bush, “I hope that the American people will uphold that standard.”
“We learned from the Polygamy issue that the government has every right to decide who can marry who,” said a Republican spokesperson, “as a party we believe in excersising that right to stop animal-people unions.”
Los Angeles’s newest couples should not be with out hope. A local worker stated, “My neighbor just married her cow, and I think it’s kinda cute. It’s neat to see the changing tide of American values.”
Comments (3)
Ahhhh, so I see that the mentality of grade-school children is the new top value for the world.
“If you love your pizza so much, why don’t you marry it?”
“If you love your pencil so much, why don’t you marry it?”
“If you love the classroom pet hamster so much, why don’t you marry it?”
And last….
At a teacher-parent conference…
“Hello Ms. Jones, I am Billy’s mother, my husband wasn’t allowed inside the school this evening for fear he would eat one of the desks. He’s a goat you see.”
This is ridiculous.
Hey I love your site, and your values! Your feelings about The Passion of the Christ were so similar to mine that it was almost scary…haha! Have a great day!
Amanda
I agree with QueenLucy!!!!!!! What has this world come to? People marrying their pets?? Don’t get me wrong, I love my dog, but not in a demented sort of way!!! EWWW